THINGS MY SPONSORS TAUGHT ME
by Paul H.
"Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous!"
page 1, paragraph 1, lines 5 & 6
...the alcoholic can recover from alcoholism but cannot be cured. page 5, paragraph 2, lines 3 & 4
..."We all have another drunk in us; we don't know whether we have another recovery in us."
page 9, paragraph 2, lines 7-9
...my recovery is an ongoing process that can be interrupted anytime I pick up a drink, no matter how many years I may have with the A.A. program.
page 10, paragraph 1, lines 2-5
Whatever number of meetings you think you need to stay sober, add one.
page 13, first quote
For the newly-sober, there's no such thing as "too many meetings."
page 14, paragraph 1
If you keep on going to meetings where nobody knows you, nobody will notice when you stop going--or when you die.
page 16, second quote
If you ever go to an A.A. meeting and you don't like it, look into the mirror to find out why.
The premise here is that one should be able to get something valuable out of any meeting, and the only barrier to this is ourselves.
page 17, second quote & paragraph 4, lines 1-3
What makes a home group effective is the attitude of its members.
page 19, paragraph 1, lines 3 & 4
Any alcoholic who has been sober all day today has something of value to tell you--all you have to do is open you ears.
page 21, first quote
Something is what you have to say may make all the difference in whether some poor drunk lives or dies--and you never know.
page 21, second quote
...it's dangerous to anyone's sobriety to have a sponsor who is not stable in recovery and is not following a solid A.A. program.
page 24, paragraph 4, lines 5-7
If you tale the booze away from a drunken S.O.B., what's left is an S.O.B. Unless something is done about it, you'll have a drunken S.O.B. again, you can count of it--that's what the Steps are all about, changing the S.O.B.
page 27, second quote
The Steps are in that order for the best of all possible reasons--they work that way!
There is divine logic in the order of the Twelve Steps. As we work each Step, we look deeper and deeper into ourselves. It's not possible to work Step One through Twelve without experiencing a profound, positive change.
page 28, first quote & paragraph 1, lines 1-4
A simplified summary of the first three Steps is: I can't, He can, I'm going to let Him.
page 29, quote
The first three Steps have to do with a personal statement of powerlessness, a belief that a Higher Power can and will intervene in our behalf, and a decision to turn our wills and our lives over to this Higher Power.
page 29, paragraph 2, lines 2-6
I don't care who knows I'm an alcoholic, so long as I don't ever forget it!
page 31, second quote
Abstinence is the best way to prevent alcoholism from progressing to its natural termination--which could be your termination.
page 32, paragraph 3, lines 10-12
If your sobriety isn't your absolute top priority, the most important thing in your life, you're going to get drunk again.
page 35, first quote
...wives, husbands, jobs, faith, family, health, and wealth all dissolve in alcohol.
page 35, paragraph 1, lines 4 & 5
If you keep on doing what you used to do, you'll keep on getting what you used to get.
page 39, first quote
If your both a smoker and a recovering alcoholic, the wisdom of A.A. is, "Take care of one addiction at a time." My sponsors thought the effort of achieving stable sobriety was so important that they didn't recommend I stop smoking at the same time. "Wait awhile," they said, "get your drinking out of the way first. Then, when you're sober, you can afford to think about your smoking." Sobriety must not share the top spot on your priorities list with anything, or else you may not maintain it.
page 40, paragraph 4, lines 1-9
Whenever you see a drunk, remember that it is, but for the grace of God, yourself you see.
page 44, second quote
If you're in a real pinch, try the short form of the Serenity Prayer: "Screw it." You'll be surprised how effective it can be.
page 45, first quote
...ask for help in staying sober. This doesn't mean we're entitled to ask God to keep us sober; we can ask for help, but the job is ours.
page 45, paragraph 3, lines 1-3
..."Without God, we cannot; without us, God will not." We ask for God's help, not his performance; that's our department.
page 45, paragraph 3, lines 6-8
If you call me at three a.m. when you're drunk and tell me you can't sleep, I'll tell you I can and hang up on you.
The purpose of a sponsor is to be a combination of a teacher, guide, cop, friend, and role model. The purpose of a sponsor is not to be an alcoholism counselor. My sponsor's remark illustrates this point. I do know some alcoholics who called their sponsors when they had been drinking, and the sponsors hung up on them. The time to use a sponsor wisely is when the urge to drink has just appeared, not when it has succeeded. Implicit in the remark I've quoted is the teaching that a sponsor is there to talk with regularly and to go to meetings with, but not to use as a crisis line.
page 60, second quote & paragraph 3
Alcoholics are so needy and dependent it's difficult to avoid rescuing them from the consequences of their drinking. But rescuing them only enables the;m to drink more.
page 61, paragraph 2
Any alcoholic who can put his or her head on the pillow at night sober has had a good day, no matter what else has gone wrong.
page 63, first quote
There's nothing so bad for an alcoholic that a drink won't make worse.
"Think of the worst possible thing that could happen to you," my sponsors said. "Imagine that this hideous thing has just happened to you, and you go to a bar to drown your sorrows. Will drinking do anything about your situation? Will it make it any better? Of course not!"
page 63, second quote & paragraph 3