STEP 9: AMENDS
One very important thing about amends and making amends to me is to STUDY!!! not just read pages 76_. What this means is like studying the Bible. It may be wise to say a pray first asking God to help us SEE and UNDERSTAND what it really says, what it really means, not what I want it to say or mean.
We make amends for US; not so others will like us, this may happen, but the reason is to get closer to God. This happens when we are NOT living with guilt, remorse and shame and are not living with FEAR of seeing someone, that something will happen if caught or found out.
Now, what do we make amends for? Well, for those or what we have harmed. OK, how have we harmed others and keeping in mind, we DON'T make amends if we have NOT harmed someone or thing. The types of harms I am speaking of are Material, Spiritual, Moral. Now when we have figured out whom we have harmed, we must figure out how to make amends. Pretty easily in the material area, but moral and spiritual, wow. Also, there are many wrongs we can not possibly correct so; starting today, we start acting differently.
Now here are 2 very important questions: 1) do I indeed owe an
amend, if not, stop here, if so go on to 2) will making an amend cause more hurt, if so and you can stand before God spiritually naked and say to Him I would make this amend but it will cause more harm if I do, then you have just as well done it because you would, this also includes amends to those who may be dead, if making amends will not cause more harm, do it, face to face.
Look at the criteria on the top of page 80, the first paragraph: if others are involved, we get there consent, consulted with others, never, never, never go off roaming through the countryside on your own, get a guide, get God involved, and again, if amends are warranted, get on with it.
Once you start making amends, Step 9, I feel at that time you
simultaneously take Steps 10,11, and 12.
I feel when we take Steps 10,11, and 12, we are doing Steps 1,2, and 3. I feel that it took me 28 years to work Step 1, damn sure don't want to work it any more but sure don't want to forget it, so Step 10, I believe God can and will take away my obsession to drink, so why keep doing that, let me expand upon it, Step 11, I made decision in Step 3, and started to carry it out when I started Step 4,5,6,7,8, and 9. I believe that is why Step 10 says: Continued to take Steps 4,5,6,7,8 and 9. I like what I got, Step 10 keeps me from going backwards, but that is not enough, what is not growing is dying, hence Step 11 for SPIRITUAL growth, and if I like what I got, and want more, I must give it away to
keep it, Step 12.
Again, my view is and it is mine, the first 9 Steps are one shot Steps, they are in the past, 1 got me here, 2_got me ready for the living of the program 10,11,12.
Hope this helps a bit. If not please let me know. Tom, if we
disagree, maybe we are just seeing something differently or we just
disagree, if so, lets try not to be disagreeable about it :
Hey, Steps 1_get us headed in the right direction with God
Steps 4_get us headed in the right direction with ourselves
Steps 8,9 get us headed in the right direction with others
Step 10 deepens and broadens our relationship with ourselves
Step 11 deepens and broadens our relationship with God
Step 12 deepens and broadens our relationship with others__
"A.S.A.P"
Always Say A Prayer